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Ask the Kabbalist Here are some reader questions that we asked guidance from the Torah Sage and Kabbalist, Rabbi Eliahu Leon Levi: Where Are the Fireworks? Question: My husband and I have been married close to ten years and we have never experienced an orgasm at the same time during our marital relations. I feel there is something missing in our relationship because of this. Am I right?   Read more...

About to Fall Off the Cliff Question: I had a great summer in Israel, learning about Judaism at a yeshiva for beginners, but ever since coming back to the US for my last year of college, I’ve been smashed by my yetzer hara (sexual drive) and I’m on the verge of giving in with a non-Jewish girl who’s been making a pass at me for some time, letting me know that she’s available to fulfill all of my fantasies. On the one hand, it’s hard to keep close to the Torah here, and on the other hand, I can’t stand feeling guilty for all of my passions and want to have some fun. And I’ve heard  that the Torah prohibits marrying gentiles, but not necessarily having relations with them (I’d use a condom to avoid pregnancy.) I know that I’m playing with fire but what can I do? I’ve spoken to the campus rabbi about getting married but he says I’m too young.   Read more...

Who the Heck Needs Family Purity? Question: With all of the problems I have in my marriage, do you really expect me to keep all the laws of family purity? There are so many of them. For instance, why can’t I just refrain from having relations with my husband during my menstruation without immersing in a mikvah afterward? Answer: For certain, many of your marital problems stem from your attitude toward this supremely holy commandment. In addition, hundreds of thousands of Jewish women guard the laws of family purity and enjoy it!   Read more...

To Cover Or Not To Cover?  Question:I want my wife to cover her hair even in the house, but she refuses, saying she can’t stand having something on her head 24 hours a day. What can I do to persuade her?  Answer:One of the most important elements of a happy marriage is “shalom bayit,” peace between the husband and wife.   Read more...

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Rules For the Mikvah PDF Print E-mail
Written by Michael   
Thursday, 30 November 2006

BE HOLY!
Guidelines For Modest Behavior In The Mikvah

Excerpted from the book, "Taharat HaKodesh" by the Gaon, Rabbi Aharon Rota

 

  • A person who does not behave in the proper, modest fashion in a mikvah, not only fails to purify himself, but also adds to his impurity and causes himself further spiritual damage.

  • Someone who enters the mikvah waters, not with the intention of immersing for spiritual purity, but rather for bodily pleasures, brings damage to himself and leads others astray.

  • A person should not think about matters of Torah in the changing room or showers, since it is forbidden to meditate on holy things in places where people are naked. This is only permissible when immersed in the waters of the mikvah. Furthermore, one should especially guard against sexual thoughts.

  • A person should strive to limit his speech as much as possible in the mikvah, for no good will come from his words. For instance, if someone should ask him a question, he should respond curtly, just enough so as not to be rude.

  • One must not be like the fools who stand naked and engage in conversation, with no sense of shame or the fear of Heaven upon them.

  • One must also not listen to the conversations of others, but rather concentrate on one's immersion and their intentions, and not linger in the mikvah any longer than necessary.

  • Since it is forbidden to go about naked (Orach Chaim, 2:1), one must endeavor to cover oneself, with a robe or towel, as much as possible, to and from the immersion pool.

  • One should not go naked to and from the bathroom.

  • It is forbidden to look at naked people, both women and men. This is one of the ways of blemishing the Yesod. It is especially forbidden to look at a man's sexual organ, including one's own. Someone who looks at the nakedness of others in the mikvah will suffer far more than he will gain by going to the mikvah.

  • Guarding one's eyes in the mikvah can be a greater tikun than the immersion itself.

  • On the way to the mikvah, a person should pray that he doesn't transgress any of the prohibitions regarding speech or sight.

  • One should not use a urinal where his nakedness can be seen by others.

  • It is best to shower at home before going to the mikvah, and not in an open area in the mikvah with others.

  • One must dress in a modest manner (for instance by putting on underwear while a towel is wrapped around his waist) and not be afraid of what scoffers might say.

Remember, one who sanctifies himself even a little below, it given great sanctity from Above.

Last Updated ( Tuesday, 13 February 2007 )
 
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