Thank you from all of my heart. You told my painful story for me, with different details of course, but the same thing happened to me, only we got a divorce. My former husband hardly ever see his children. He is probably still addicted. I lived three years with this nightmare and the pain has been stuck in my heart but it helps knoing there are others and maybe I can help other women too like you are doing by telling them not to blame themselves, this is a disease not something that happens because we are not attractive enough for our husbands - in fact I am considered a pretty woman with lots of offers, but it is a terrible disease and women must learn not to punish themselves by staying in empty marriages, but have the strength to know that they can start over again.