Jewish Sexuality dot Com

Question:
I am a 25 year old yeshivah student. I have been clean from masturbation for about 2 years. (In the past I was very doing it almost every day.) I just started dating and find myself getting an erection from just spending time with and speaking to a girl. Help! What is wrong with me? Is it physical? Is it leftover addiction from my fantasy days? It's driving me crazy, what do I do? Please help me.

I am a 25 year old yeshiva student. I have been clean from masturbation for about 2 years. (In the past I was very doing it almost every day.) I just started dating and find myself getting an erection from just spending time with and speaking to a girl. Help! What is wrong with me? Is it physical? Is it leftover addiction from my fantasy days? It's driving me crazy, what do I do? Please help me.

Answer:
Nothing is the matter with you at all. What you describe is a very common
and natural phenomenon in young men before marriage when they are dating.
Don't get down on yourself. Even if you should have an accidental emission
when out on a date - it happens to lots of young men. When you are married
and you have a holy outlet for your sexual energies, what you describe will
happen less and less. G-d created the sexual urge and only the greatest
Tzaddikim are not affected by it in this matter. People who are not on their
level should not get down on themselves for having overly active libidos. Since you
realize that it is your job to keep your sexual energies in check, and since you showed
great devotion to G-d in giving up bad habits, you are certainly on the
path of holiness, not the opposite, as you seem to think. Your heartfelt
pain over your situation is already t’shuva (penitence). Keep dating and bezrat Hashem,
with G-d’s help, you will find your proper and holy mate soon.