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After analyzing the many different facets of t'shuva, Rabbi Kook explains what happens to a person who sets out on a path of return. The first thing we should know is that there are many barriers to t'shuva (Rambam, Laws of T'shuva, Ch. 4). To begin with, when someone is not accustomed to sounds of holiness, his ears are blocked to t'shuva's constant call.

Did someone call or did I hear a calling?

"Turn Back From Your Sins!"

Life's inner moral demand calls out to man, "Turn back from your sins!" Sometimes this inner moral compunction begins as a soft echo barely audible in the conscience. Was it a voice? Did I hear someone calling? Little by little, it gains in volume and insistency until it thunders, SON OF MAN, RETURN FROM YOUR EVIL WAYS!

Occasionally this voice calls out so loudly, it rings in a person's ear wherever he goes. It won't give him rest. "RETURN!" it calls out in the discotheque. "RETURN!" it calls out at the beach. Return it calls when he sits down to view forbidden things on the Internet.

"Leave me alone!" the hounded soul cries out. No longer can he pretend not to listen. No longer can he remain in the chains of crass material existence with all of its vices and pulls.

At this point, Rabbi Kook says, a person must rise to a higher spiritual level in order to find inner peace. He must summon inner courage to face this spiritual crisis. Sometimes, however, the moral demands of t'shuva seem so great, a person despairs of ever being able to escape the clutches of sin. His transgressions, like thorns, pin him down on every side. Outside forces seem to control him. He sees no possible way of making amends.

Once again, Rabbi Kook offers hope by telling us that it is precisely from this point of despair that G-d's mercy will shine, as King David wrote, "A broken and contrite heart, O G-d, Thou will not despise" (Tehillim, 51:19; Orot HaT'shuva, 13:8).

Where There Is A Will, There Is A Way

Sometimes when a person has a passionate desire to do t'shuva, he longs to perfect everything all at once. Discovering a world of greater morality, he immediately wants to actualize it in life. A sudden spiritual illumination has raised him out of his darkness, and he wants all of his actions, thoughts, and character traits to be immediately on the same holy level. With all that needs to be corrected, he does not know where to begin. It is easier to contemplate a state of absolute morality than to achieve it in everyday life. The more t'shuva he does, the more he feels the gap between where he is and where he should be. Without a firm foundation in the realm of the holy, he can easily grow discouraged and lose his resolve to become a more moral person. As a result, people who begin learning about Judaism, and about their inner spiritual world, often put on the brakes in fear of experiencing further letdown in not being able to reach their ideals.

"If a person wants all of his inner sensitivities and powers to be instantly renewed in line with the spiritual elevation which he has discovered, and expects all of his immoral ways to be immediately straightened and perfected - he will lack inner stability, and he will not be able to fortify his will to follow the path to true perfection" (Orot HaT'shuva, 13:6).

With t'shuva, don't skip that step. Take one at a time.

Next, a person must intensify the illumination of holiness within him. This is to be found in the study of Torah. As we have learned, the study of Torah strengthens the will to do t'shuva and refines character traits and modes of behavior.

After the will for t'shuva has been firmly established, the person is ready for the details of t'shuva. This stage has two aspects: t'shuva over behavior in the future, and t'shuva over transgressions in the past. Once again, the Torah provides the guidance and light. The Torah translates the ideal moral will for goodness which the person has discovered into the details of day-to-day living.

Focus On The Future

Rabbi Kook writes:

"The foundation of t'shuva should always be established on the goal of improving the future. In the beginning of the t'shuva process, correcting the past should not be seen as an impeding prerequisite. If a person would immediately start by redressing the past, he would encounter many obstacles, and the paths of t'shuva, and the coming closer to G-d, would seem to be too difficult. However, if a person truly endeavors to refine his future deeds, Divine assistance is promised, even in correcting transgressions of the past" (Orot HaT'shuva, 13:9b).

Since it is easier to commit oneself to a more positive life in the future, this is the place to start. For instance, a person decides that from now on he will not say anything bad about people. This future-oriented t'shuva is easier to pinpoint and work on. Someone can even make a list of goals and refer to it every day to help him keep on his course. This way, consistent progress will be made and feelings of frustration will become less and less acute.

It is much harder to figure out how you are going to mend wrongdoings which you have done in the past. First of all, a person may not remember all of his sins. For example, it is hard to remember all of the bad things one might have said about people. It is even harder to remember to whom they were said. How can a person find everyone in order to make amends? A situation like this can cause a person to give up in despair.

Rabbi Kook's advice is to set out correcting the transgressions of the past which are within the person's reach to correct. This will set into motion a snowball of t'shuva whose inner force will lead him to correct matters more and more difficult, until he succeeds in redressing all wrongs.

In summary, stage one is the consolation in knowing that the thought of t'shuva is already t'shuva. Stage two is developing a firmer base in the Torah. Stage three is the resolve not to sin in the future. Stage four, the resolve to gradually address the wrongs of the past, beginning with the matters that are easiest to mend.